The Healing Power of Connection

Have you ever found yourself feeling deeply connected with someone—beyond words—even when you were speaking the same language?

No matter how much you practice or reflect, some old patterns still show up. It reminds me that healing isn’t always about making those patterns disappear, but about finding connection, even while carrying them.

Recently, I participated in a retreat as a facilitator. During a casual chat with a participant, she said: “Sometimes my old patterns just show up” and I found myself nodding, “Yeah, me too.” In that moment, my heart felt a warm sense of recognition—like, “Ah, we’re the same.” Even though we were speaking in English, it felt as if we were connecting beyond words.

At this retreat, I had been teaching an experiential practice called Cross-Lingual Focusing. It’s an exercise that invites participants to connect with someone even when they don’t share a common language—focusing on presence and resonance rather than words. I wanted them to experience that connection truly can exist beyond language.

Yet in that moment with her, even though we were using the same language, I felt that same wordless connection. It reminded me that sometimes, even when words are available, there is a deeper sense of resonance that transcends language.

This realization made me so happy.

Over the years, I’ve studied and practiced therapy, working through my own traumas and old patterns-like that familiar inner voice telling me I’m not doing well enough. And yet, those old patterns never completely disappear. They still come up from time to time. Rather than seeking to eliminate them entirely, I’ve learned to carry them alongside me. And in those moments when I can connect with others—even while carrying those patterns—it feels like a profound healing.

In that moment, I even forgot that I was speaking in English. It wasn’t about language at all—it was about a felt sense of connection.

Looking back, I think the most meaningful part of this retreat was realizing that even if old patterns remain—even if perfect healing doesn’t exist—we can still find moments of connection with others. That awareness itself felt deeply healing to me.

Perhaps you, too, have had moments like that.

I hope you continue to treasure those moments, too.

May you always find a space where you can be just as you are.

Thank you for reading.